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The Soapbox Filipina | October 23, 2019

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Five Types of Aldub Fans on Twitter (Part 1) - The Soapbox Filipina

Pier Angeli B. Ang Sen

 

 

 

 

 

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I have been kalyesery-ed!  I am a huge fan of Aldub, the Lolas and the Kalyeserye. I was not able to regain my old self -from eight months ago. But more than being a fan of the three lolas and Alden and Yaya, I have also acquired a new habit. That newly acquired habit of scrolling down my twitter feed, right after an episode. 

After watching an episode on tv, on live stream or on you tube, I hurriedly go to twitter and search for the HT (hashtag) of the day.

Then, I feast on the tweets and comments of my idols–-not necessarily that of Alden, Maine or the Lolas but of Aldub fans.

Yep, I am a fan of Aldub Fans on twitter. I have categorized five very interesting types of Aldub fans on twitter that I am a fan of.

 

 

1. ALDUB JARGONISTAS

 

These are the type of Aldub fans on twitter that I love the most. They are those, who set the lingo, on twitter-verse.  Trust them to be the first, to put original labels and titles on the people, places and events related to The Kalyeserye.

They are “the creatives” of the fandom—creating memes, music videos, and whathaveyous on the Aldub twitter feed. They are the writers too -writing songs, poems and fictional stories.

They “put words” into my Aldub-fan mouth. They provide the jargon. They give new usage for words. They probably were the very first ones to have used the initials, K.S.” for Kalyeserye, on twi’rr. They most likely were the humorous ones, who first tweeted, “don’t us” (huwag kami).

They are the funny lot , who after a kilig episode, first used  huwag kang sumama sa liwanag”, in  Poltergeist fashion: Carol Anne – listen to me. Do NOT go into the light. Stop where you are. Turn away from it. Don’t even look at it.”—Dianne, Poltergeist 1

They may be the ones who would post crazy tweets like: Alden is a heavy drinker ( duh?)—heavily drinking to the sight of Maine.”

Also the ones, who asked shippers of the Aldub love team:  “Nagshi-ship po ba kayo dito sa Probinsiya? “H.M. po”? (putting a smile already on my face)

They are those, who, after a kilig episode, would leave comments like, “Dear EB, nxt tym po mangolekta nalang po kayo ng orientation fee, kaysa ganito, hindi kami na orient.”

They are also the creative fan-writers on watty, whom I lovingly pertain to as “wataris.”

Talented “wataris”, who create writings about Aldub.They are so talented that they have to earmark their writings with, “pawang gawa-gawa po lamang—parang awa niyo na”. (since many a funny-walains take their “opus” as truth) That is how great their writings are.

It seems also that KS writers do read their tweets. It is because their suggestions, no matter how impossible, sometimes, get actualized on a KS episode. I feel a sense of déjà vu when watching an episode the following day. “All sparks na all sparks”. 

May they continue, to leave witty remarks on twi’rr, while adding to the Aldub vernacular.

 

 

2. ALDUB PALEONTOLOGISTS

 

They are Aldub Paleontologists from the House of Soco. They are fans who could dig up fossilized tweets -from hundred years before. Fossil-tweets of Maine and Alden, left buried and forgotten, till they came along.

Aldub Paleontologists, are undeniably affiliated with SOCO. They know the precise moment when and where Alden’s eyes, arms, hands and lips rested, when the shots were first fired.  They are the significant “niyo” , in “maari niyo po bang isalaysay, sa hukumang ito, ang mga pangyayari nuong araw na iyon”?  By process of deduction, elimination and reverse engineering, they get hold of incriminating pieces of evidence (even those tucked away for safe keeping).

Aldub Paleontologists, are connected with the forensics department of CSI, perhaps acquiring Alden’s DNA sample,  by taking a swab from the straws-that-traded-places. They were the first to spot, the blue-striped straw from the red-striped straw—in a blue&red lithmus paper reaction. 

They know and feel, when something is not right with Aldub. They must be those children who “got all ten correctly” on  Spot the Difference, of the Sunday paper’s comic section.

They are all expert lip readers. 

They can back read effortlessly. 

They have super-power abilities, cctv-like. 

They see every thing Aldub, while adhering to ” What is essential is invisible to the eye.” 

They see “the couple” shirts, shoes, bracelets, watches and even the couple pimples shared. They exactly know, the when, where, why and how, behind the pimples’ first appearance on Maine or Alden’s faces. (information that even the pimples themselves have no knowledge of)

They even saw the veins on Maine’s hand –na mabilis daw insertan ng I.V. They could see the size of Aldens smile- whether live or laid on a sheet of paper, one whole , 1/2, 1/4, lengthwise or crosswiseThey know Alden’s smile, upon seeing Yaya or Maine -if it was a half-smile, a suppressed smile, a b.f.f. smile or a boyfie smile.

They can spot a breach, through a period piece in the Nidora and Anselmo time frame. They know if it time travelled, to the present day Kalyeserye. (like the “kiss-me” on Anselmo’s head, did it open a portal, right smack (pardon the pun) into Maine’s lips on her birthday? )

They probably were the first ones to find out, where the safehouse of Yaya Dub was, when she was kidnapped by Duhrizz. Or the residential address and phone numbers of The Riding in Tandem.

Most importantly,

Aldub Paleontologists are clairvoyant. 

They know exactly the ganap, when they tweet, hours before EB that “nasa barangay si Alden! 38,39, party!” They sometimes leave cryptic and mind-boggling remarks which drive my aldub-thirsty brain crazy. Their tweets appear like, they are privy to the goings on, of the lives of the two celebrities. It would make the rest of us wonder, sino kaya talaga ang nagmamay ari ng account na ito? bodyguard ni Maine, driver ni Alden or  sina Alden o Maine mismo?

With that said, I have all reason to believe that they know the number of lashes, settled on Maine’s lower lids. Grabe syaah!..silaaah! 

The Aldub Paleontologists from the House of Soco. These are the fans who never fail to amaze me, actually.   

 

 

 

 

3. ALDUB FOREVERISTAS

 

 

First name May. Last name Poreber.

They are The Foreveristas. They believe in destiny, faith, fate, tadhana at pananalig .

(never upset the balance of Forever Universe, lest upset them)

Their posts make them the most passionate, if not enthusiastic kind of Aldub Fans on twitter. They express both appreciation and disappointment, emphatically. They will ask for explanations when they need to. Yung feelings nila mahalaga—-kailangan pinananugutan. (feelings na minsan piso ang tumpok at paminsan tatlo isang daan)

They have developed a certain aversion to “hopia”. They have lower tolerance for the busina ng truck ng basura. They are the perpetrators, behind the deadly attacks on the replay button.

They declare with conviction that sila ay hindi kumakainhindi nag mo-move on at ang pinakamaikling panahon, para maka pag move on, ang mga tulad nila, ay— 11 years. 

Sila ay hindi natutulog, hindi kumakain at hindi na magkakaanak –dahil sa mga ovaries na sumasabog.

Nag se-sepanx, when they find out about the out-of-town and out-of-the-country shows of Alden. They definitely are, not fans of ribbon cuttingsThey panic the most, for the Kalyeserye -more than the show’s scriptwriters themselves. ( The Foreveristas are most likely the ones being told by the other fans, “tahan na bunso,tiwala lang, huwag bumitaw”.)

In other words, they are the fans, who you upset the least. But, well, they are cute that way. ( basta ba walang negative posts)

They are the passionate lovers of the love team. Their love also make them, the greatest defenders of Aldub nation. 

They are para troopers –para sa tabi. (as Lola Tini would say) 

They are always every ready to defend the fandom, anytime of the day. You would not want to cross their paths.  They are consistent in all universe. Their love, loyalty and protection are consistent in all multi-verse, whether in social-media universe, earth 1 and way up to earth 17.

They are the Rogelio-like fans, on twitter-verse. They are on-line most of the time, guarding aldub land from poachers.

They probably were the very first ones on twitter, who communicated with the NBI and CIDG -with regards to the whereabouts of Yaya. She went missing for almost five episodes. 

Or maybe the ones who sent messages to the fb page of Pares in Retiro, where Yaya was last seen eating, before she was kidnapped. They surely were the ones who tweeted a certain pawnshop -if they came into possession of a missing forever ring.

The Foreveristas are those group of fans who must have, first, blurred the lines between Aldub’s reel and real. 

They are the happiest, when Aldub paleontologists discover BTS pics & videos and fossil-tweets. 

They are so loyal that they will be the very same fans, whom we will  be seeing, twenty years from now, cheering for BOTH Alden and Maine.

As fans, they only believe in two things:

1. Alden & Maine

and

2. Maine & Alden

These type of fans are awe-inspiring, for they never entertain the negative write-ups about their idols, kasi nga, may forever di ba?

( P.S. because I believe in faith and destiny and since God had a hand in my own love story, I think I am “partly ” this type of fan too.)

 

 

TO BE CONTINUED… CLICK HERE

 

 

 

 

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